Q: Why do little boys whine?
A: Because they are practicing to be men.
Q: Why do only 10% of men make it to heaven?
A: Because if they all went, it would be Hell.
Q: Why do men like smart women?
A: Opposites attract.
Q: How do men define a "50/50" relationship?
A: We cook-they eat; we clean-they dirty; we iron-they wrinkle.
Q: How do men exercise on the beach?
A: By sucking in their stomachs every time they see a bikini.
Q: How does a man show he's planning for the future?
A: He buys two cases of beer instead of one.
Q: How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: ONE -He just holds it up there and waits for the world to revolve around him.
Q: What did God say after creating man?
A: I can do so much better.
Q: What do you call a man with half a brain?
A: Gifted.
Q: What do you do with a bachelor who thinks he's God's gift to women?
A: Exchange him.
Q: What should you give a man who has everything?
A: A woman to show him how to work it.
Q: What's the best way to force a man to do sit ups?
A: Put the remote control between his toes.
Q: What's the difference between Big Foot and an intelligent man?
A: Big Foot's been spotted several times.
Q: Why are all dumb blonde jokes one liners?
A: So men can understand them.
Q: Why did God create man before woman?
A: Because you're always supposed to have a rough draft before creating your masterpiece.
Q: Why do female black widow spiders kill the males after mating?
A: To stop the snoring before it starts.